ABOUT
LLANI HILL
Mama to Mama Founder
Registered Nurse - Life Coach - Reconnected Birthing Practitioner
I am a fellow member of the sacred Mum Club. A club you only truly understand once in it. One that isn’t always what we expected, or may not feel right just yet. But one that connects us through such a sacred bond, Mother to Mother. And thus “Mama to Mama” was born.
Let me take you back to the start, when I had my first Son, Coda.
I walked into that hospital as naïve as they come.
I thought because I was a nurse and kept fit, that birth would be easy. And if it wasn’t, I would simply elect for an epidural and all would be good.
Boy was I wrong.
After almost 30 of the most traumatic hours of my life, this tiny, bruised human was placed in my arms. Arms that were still shaking from shock and my first feelings were, “what have I done”.
After what I experienced, there were no “love at first sight” feelings, no instant bond, no “I was born to do this” mentality. I was in pure survival mode.
I walked, well limped, out of that hospital physically, mentally and emotionally, broken. All I felt, was I was already a failure of a Mother, which built a very strong foundation of Postpartum Depression. I completely lost myself, I was a shell of a human. My clothes didn’t fit, I did not recognise myself in the mirror, I wasn’t enjoying what I thought I would, I was isolated, sleep-deprived, depressed.
What actually helped me the most, was going back to work.
Regaining a piece of “Llani”. Piece by piece, I began to put myself back together. I found another piece at the gym, another at a psychologist, another when I asked my circle for help, another communicating with my Husband. A big piece I found, was when I worked with a life coach. That was my motivation behind getting my own accreditation. I then found a birth debriefing course and signed up to that. The “Reconnected Birthing Practitioner” course I completed, ended up being the biggest piece of the puzzle. I decided to blend all of my lived experience, with the skills I learnt, to create the service I needed as a Mum. One that helps Mothers put together their pieces. A puzzle that once I finished, I realised, being broken meant I could put it back together even better than it was before.
I hadn’t just birthed a baby, I had birthed a Mother.
What was new to him, was new to me. Just as new babies need to be held, a new Mother needs to be held.
I now have 3 very beautiful, very busy boys. I am enjoying Motherhood and life more than ever before. I have worked very hard on my mindset and my entire family reaps the benefits.
My aim with “Mama to Mama” is to bridge the gap I was missing. To provide a Mother-centred service. One that creates a safe haven for you, as a Mother, to be seen, heard and understood. Because “If Mothers are well, families can be well. And if families are well, then society has a much better chance of being well.” - Dr Oscar Serrallach. You, Mama, are so important. Let me hold the space for you.
